Monday, July 16, 2012

Reflection time

One of my many favorite summer past times is to go to the local pool. I love taking my children but I also love just taking one or two days out of the short summer and go on my own. Mostly, this has been done when they are with their Dad for his weekend.

It gives me time to just swim and relax without the added stress of Mom Mom Mom. Not that I don't enjoy my children. I really do. I know not many people would find it fun to spend the day at the pool alone but I find it very enjoyable.

It gives me moments to reflect on life happenings and yesterday the pool was pretty full but not overly croweded that I didn't have trouble finding room to swim around.

A couple times, I found myself near black Mom's or Dad's with their children young children and my memories of playing with many of the black children that I played with during my time with MELD and I smiled at the little child with many happy memories from MELD.

A thought came to my mind and I wanted to blog about it. I think volunteering for MELD and with quite a bit of the children being black or other races... it got me thinking about how I believe MELD has made me more of a friendly person when I greet people of other races.

Don't get me wrong. I don't think I was ever insulting or rude or made racist statements to anyone but considering that my Dad was raised by a father that was rasist and my Dad raised me and his veiws was noticed that even though I don't share their same neagive thoughts.

I have worked hard in the last couple years to give the same warm smile to the black families compared to someone of my own race. I think I was guilty of veiwing the whole population of one race based on actions or behaviors that I have seen or heard about and I was wrong.

I think it took taking care of children newborn to about five to start seeing them not just as african american children but children. Children that are innocent, cute and creative. Children that want and need love and attention without judging them by the color of thier skin or the actions of others.

So MELD and I parted on bad terms but I don't regret my time with them because I know I did my best and I came out a better person and it did have a lot to help me cope with feelings about adoption loss and a focas other than my own pain.

Another reason that I got to thinking about MELD is that my friend Susie got involved with this group that sells things and I ended up buying two bags of baby clothes for my dolls. HAHA. I dind't quite realize that she had two bags of baby girl clothes and no way can I keep them all.

I have to find a home for them and it's got me thinking about what do I do with them. At this point, I am just not sure. I am not going to say I won't support MELD with donations but I would like to see if there is another option for my community.

For Those new to my Blog.. You can read about MELD on the top of my blog and MELD and I had a falling out over them getting upset over my suggestions to consider the young Mom's to spend time in the daycare to see that side of childcare in an environment where two or three people are taking care of 6 to 9 children. We had issues of no bottles, no diapers and it make it more challenging to give quality child care. I even went as far as to suggest diaper bag checks and offered to donate a gift card as a reward and MELD excused me of my servies.

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