Friday, January 16, 2009

a little bit about Mom and Dad

They had four kids. 3 girls and 1 boy. They had two girls first. So we have girl1 and I am girl 2 and then the boy was born 8 years or so after the girl2 and then girl3 was born about 4 years after boy.
My Dad would say the craziest things right after he had all four kids.He would say girl1 is special, because she is my first, girl3 is special, because she is my baby, and boy well he is just my boy. I felt like saying hello... What about me? My Dad said stupid things and made mistakes, but he is in my life. He calls about once a week, and we see him either for soda or he stops by.
Dad and Mom divorced a long time ago. My relationship with Mom has been very unstable over the years. It was one sided. If I wanted to see Mom or talk to her, I had to make the effort. If I just didn't bother to call or go see her.. I didn't see or talk to her. She has only called a few times and only been to my place twice in all my adult years. At once time, I accepted this relationship. I have done experiments where I see how long I can not call or see her. I am trying to see if she would call. I have gone as long as six months and I am the one who gives in and calls. She has whined and cried to my Dad that girl2 don't call. Since girl3 and boy was living at home still, I didn't see a whole lot of them growing up after I moved when I was 19 years old.
The fact that my Mom didn't make any kind of effort to see or talk to really bugged me a lot. But I figured she was like that with all her kids. I didn't take it personal and continued to make the phone calls and invite myself over once in a great while. The last few holiday dinners at her house, sister3 asked me if I was going to Mom's. I was never really invited, or was it just assumed I would come for holidays. My mom hasn't seen a whole lot of my boys.
Well I will continue this at a later time.

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