Thursday, March 5, 2009

This week it has been six months since I sent Izzy's parents the first letter with one photo of me. Today I am sending another letter, but it's much shorter and I am trying to appeal to them concerning my boys. I am hoping that with the pictures they can see that they are real people and not have the heart to deny them. I am including about 5 or 6 pictures that share what the three of us look like.
I feel guilty that I do not plan to tell my husband. I will probably tell him after the fact if it's a good response. If I am ignored again then I will just keep quiet.
I have been nervous, because I am opening myself up for more hurt. I have to accept the fact that when the letter goes in the mail today that I might be hurt again. On the other hand, if I don't send it, I will always wonder. If they can get a letter asking for a reply no matter what they have to say, and still ignore me. I will be worried about Izzy. I will wonder what kind of people are raising her. If they have any heart at all.. they have to write back something. My biggest fear this time isn't going to be rejection, because they already did that. It's going to be a For Sale sign in front of their house. The is the last thing I want. Izzy should be finishing 11th grade in June. So all she has left is her Senior year. May they not be so scared and insecure of me that they up root her for her last year in school. From the year book pictures, she has spent her junior years in one school and her high school years in another. Izzy had that much better than me. I moved around a lot. So lets up they think of her and only her before the For Sale sign goes up. Some people might as why am I not happy with the year book pictures. Well for one I am glad that I have them, but it's not something I am proud of to show off. Well time to get ready for work.

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