Saturday, April 30, 2011

A little reminder

I was off work for a few weeks because my client had some health problems our company wasn't taking care of her. Time off works two ways for me. One, I get to spend more time with my family and I love it. I get to cleaning more and cooking more for them. I spend more time at the Ymca and that is really good for me.

The bad side is that I spend too much time online and that's not always good. I sit online wishing for more contact between my daughter and myself. I sit without pay and things got tight. However, my husband did a pretty good job keeping up. I did end up getting an unemployment check but not until yesterday and now I am back to work.

Well, it took towards the end of my week to be cool with being back to work. My client is more needy right now and that works for me. I like that feeling. She always needs me but it's more now.

Mother's day is coming up and I been thinking about it. Who am I going to give flowers to or call or send a card too? Will my boys take it upon themselves to give me a present on their own? Alex makes money here and there and Stephen gets allowance now but spent all his money on himself... I know that presents isn't everything but it's nice to be remembered. Will my daughter remember me on Mother's day

Well, anyways, my client happens to have a friend who was the principal at the small school that I went to in high school. Small world right? So, she wanted to talk to me tonight when she called my client and we talked for a few and she asked me if I had seen or talked to Pam lately? I said, I had seen her in late January and I would most likely be calling her on Mother's Day because she is like a Mom to me and she fills the void that is missing from my lack of a relationship with my Mom and I explained how my Mom just ignores me.

She said, life just deals us a bad hand or something to that extent. She also said twice is that "You do know that it's not your fault" "It's nothing you have done or about you as a person. I told her that it took a long time for me to learn that. It's a good reminder as Mother's Day gets closer I have to remember it's not about me. I don't want to focus on what I don't have but what I do have. I don't know if I will make too much of a effort to surprise to many mother's with flowers. I just don't have the money and I am not going to stress it.

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