Majority of this blog is about adoption loss. I am also the Mom to a 21 year old son and a 16 year old son. I am fresh out of adoption related topics so I will use this blog to write just about whatever is going on in my life and may throw in adoption and reunion in here when the urge hits me. I recently went thru a bad divorce. I know it was quick but I found love and that has brought me much needed happiness. I may write about my relationship at times.
Are we forgetting the dads? Dads are almost always at a disadvantage in about all things domestic. Courts, adoptions, society in general tend to overlook the importance of the father and partner in kids upbringing. Even people that seem to know that, tend to forget. Even this letter fails to mention dads. The bias towards young dads is very real. Dads are ignored or, in some cases, actively written out of their children's lives. For example, moms looking for adoption for their child, alot of times, just say that they don't know who the dad is. Simpler that way.(Come on, we know that they are pretty sure who is the dad) And we wonder why dads don't stand up. Boys learn from their moms and others that they are not the primary caregiver. Sperm donor and paycheck. I am glad that my mom taught me that men and women are equal and share the same joys and heartbreaks and responsibilities together. Society forgets this. I have been a dad for 25 years and have felt and experienced this bias and it is very hard to overcome. Men that take care of children are treated funny and older men that take an interest in kids are initialy thought of as perverts. (Don't get me started on the old white guy talking to black children) Ah well, it is better than it used to be.
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Are we forgetting the dads? Dads are almost always at a disadvantage in about all things domestic. Courts, adoptions, society in general tend to overlook the importance of the father and partner in kids upbringing. Even people that seem to know that, tend to forget. Even this letter fails to mention dads. The bias towards young dads is very real. Dads are ignored or, in some cases, actively written out of their children's lives. For example, moms looking for adoption for their child, alot of times, just say that they don't know who the dad is. Simpler that way.(Come on, we know that they are pretty sure who is the dad) And we wonder why dads don't stand up. Boys learn from their moms and others that they are not the primary caregiver. Sperm donor and paycheck. I am glad that my mom taught me that men and women are equal and share the same joys and heartbreaks and responsibilities together. Society forgets this. I have been a dad for 25 years and have felt and experienced this bias and it is very hard to overcome. Men that take care of children are treated funny and older men that take an interest in kids are initialy thought of as perverts. (Don't get me started on the old white guy talking to black children) Ah well, it is better than it used to be.
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