Monday, September 27, 2010

Meld fundraising and my emotional experience tonight

For the past few weeks, I have been caring for a new born boy. He was six weeks so he must be nine weeks now. In the 3 ten week session, he is the first while child. I have blogged about race in my private blog. I don't know if my emotional feelings today came from the fact that he is the first newborn that I have seen with Meld and also the first white child. But anyways, tonight the baby was kind of fussy because she forgot his bottle. She said he already had a bottle but hoped he wouldn't be hungry. So, he was mostly awake and alert but I could tell he was kind of wanting a bottle. The best thing I could do was wrap him in his blanket and let him suck on his own hand. He was falling asleep on me and then all of a sudden, I came so close to crying. I felt like how I could really love this child. I have spent less than five hours total with him in the few weeks and I could love him as my own. Don't get scared people. I am not going to steal him. I just kind of thought is this how adoptive parents feel? Do they really fall in love that fast? Meld has really been teaching me more and more. Sometimes, it's hard to see the fact that Izzy's parents love her as much as me. In my heart, I know they do. But I can't help but feel like I want that kind of love just for me to give.

This session, I have been more friendly with the Mom's. Plus, it is the third session that some of them are seeing me for. I know the kids by their voices. I impressed one mom when I heard who daughter crying and she heard me say there comes "Ella" I feel so more confident than I did in the beginning. I also feel so blessed. I know that I am doing Meld, the moms and the babies a service but they are providing something on such a deep level.

This was the male volunteer second week and I like him. We haven't really talked but he has made a difference in the care of the older child. There is more control now. He isn't running through the room with the kid grocery cart out of control. It's teaching me to be more open minded. I didn't think male would be good.

The amount that I have raised and that includes me setting aside my five for Meld. I tried to put it into the account and I was told that I couldn't email myself money. :) So, I will keep it at home or make my husband use his bank account. The amount raised in this first week was 20.00 dollars. I don't think that's too bad for the first week. I have faith that more people will donate. Also, if anyone would like to put this request on your blog that would be really great. If anyone has any baby clothes to toddler clothes that they would like to send, I am open to giving out an address only if I can get a feel for who you are. Thanks again, for those who have donated to Meld.

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