Monday, January 10, 2011

I thought I would spend a little time blogging about the language that is used with divorced couples and the children. My ex and I both have joint custody of the children, but he has physical custody of our older son and I have physical custody of our younger son.

For those who don't know what all that means is that physical just refers to where the child lives primary. The other parents time with the children isn't really called visitation. The professionals think that children need to feel that both homes are their home and not to make it seem like the child is visiting. I am not sure if changing the language has changed my kids feelings compared to where I grew up in the times where it was called visitation.

Both parents have all legal rights to the children. Once my new husband referred to my son as close to it is with Izzy. I was furious. While him living with his Dad wasn't my ideal situation it's nothing like an adoption. We both have legal say of religion, health and schooling over both children.

In my state, if I had both kids, my ex husband would have to pay about 20% of his income to me for child support. (I think that's correct. It could be 25%) However, since the judge ruled that our income is very close to being the same that neither parent pays. So, just for the record, if one parent made X amount of dollars more than the other parent.. they would be required to pay child support to the other parent even though we each have one. In my state, they don't take a new spouses income into account for this. This may seem unfair advantage but it is what it is.

I will end it with that information for now. Just for the record. We have divorced in 2006 and I married pretty fast after that.

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