My son had a pretty good birthday. I explained to him the morning of that we were not going to have a party this weekend. I explained that he is getting too old and that I would like birthdays to be more about the family, or maybe one friend. I want to keep it small.
So, he went to school and I picked up his cupcake cake that he wanted to take to his tutoring club. We might have skipped tutoring on his birthday, but bringing something was his idea. When, he got home, my husband was wanting to give him his gifts, because he don't believe in celebrating the birthday, any other day than the birthday. I think our disagreements kind of make things worse. Because we didn't do it the way, I think is best. But he gets his gifts and seems happy, but then says to his step dad so are you coming to my birthday party? I reminded him how we said that were were not going to do a party and he threw a fit. He went on to say how he was mad, because he didn't have his brother there and no party. He wasn't happy. I explained again, how on spring break, we can go to where he wanted to go, but it's not gonna be a party.
We had a parent teacher conference to go to and my friend Rachel, offered to take him to get an ice cream cone. She came to get him and we went to the conference. Then, she dropped him off. She had quite a few people with her and that wasn't part of the plan. My son was given a choice. She could take him and her daughter to get an ice cream cone, but first would have to drop the other kids off or they all could go to her place and have cake and ice cream that was left over from a party that they had a day ago. My son choose the option where everyone got ice cream. I was proud of him.
This weekend, when my older son is home. I am going to allow Tyler to choose what to cook for dinner and we are going to have cake and ice cream. Then, that will be our new tradition. Except, I will stick to my desire to have the dinner on the weekend when everyone can be there. I think kids have to learn that sometimes we can't always take time off from work. It sucks but that is just how it is.
My husband bought him a fishing pole set and I got him a remote control cop car and a movie. He loves his gifts. I am so happy that it is spring and we all can start getting fresh air.
1 comment:
I've been reading your blog. I just want to say that you are not alone in what you feel. I know from looking at blog after blog that it seems the world is full of happy families doing everything right. The truth is it's easy to paint that picture in a blog. When you look close enough at any family there is a lot of pain somewhere. I guess I just wanted you to know that I understand the loneliness that can exist even in a family group. I know the superhuman effort it takes to make a happy life for your family when all the time you are feeling sad, irrelevant, lonely. I know how very strong you have to be to make it work. And you will make it work. You are making it work. You only have to make it work one day at a time and you are doing that. Good for you.
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