Thursday, December 6, 2012


A couple weeks ago, with only a days notice, my best friend's Mother called me and invited me to a surprize party. I said I could come and then she just blurted can you give me 25 dollars. I was shocked and told her I didn't know if I had it and if I did I would bring it. She told me she was trying to get a stripper.

I didn't bring cash but wrote a check for twenty. Overall, I don't mind helping with the party but didn't like how she did it. There wasn't a stripper and turns out she asked other friends of my best friend.

This isn't how my friend puts a party together. She would never dream to ask you for money. She might ask you to bring ice, soda or a desert if you could.

Question: Do I tell my friend? Or keep it to myself? My friend is always buying my lunch ect so it's not the money but the way the Mom went about it.

Another question: Alex has a gf and has her over a few times a week. Often times during dinner and we feel put on the spot. I got on him for inviting her to eat pizza with us without asking us first. Tonight, she ate the dinner my husband cooked.

We buy dinner to feed at least 4 to 5 people but 5 is pushing it. We used to use the leftovers for my lunch or my husband's lunch.

Question: For those with older teens. Do you feed your children's gf/bf or friends?

Last question. I am doing my Christmas shopping and within the next week I will be sendng Izzy Christmas gifts. I am scaling it down quite a bit since money is tight.

Question: Do I send a gift for her fiance?


Leah said...

I'll try my best to give my opinions. :)

Regarding your friend's mom, it is rude she went about it that way, and I'm guessing your best friend would be a bit embarrassed to learn that her mom did it that way, but. . . I would not say anything to your friend. She may feel like she has to defend her mom even though she agrees it was rude on her part. Or, she may feel like she needs to give her mom money for the party thrown on her behalf. Either way, I don't think anything good will come out of telling her.

The feeding the GF issue. I'm from a family of 4 kids, so my parents were constantly feeding 6 mouthes, and we did have friends and significant others over a lot for parties, etc. But, if this is something you struggle with, perhaps you could sit your son down and tell him this?

And could you get Izzy and her fiance a joint gift? Like perhaps something for their apartment.

Good luck. :)

Debbie said...

I wouldnt say anything to your friend. I would ask her mother about the use of the money since there wasnt a stripper at the party. Maybe she just took up a collection for her own private JK

As far as feeding guests when they come over. We always feed our kids friends and it is sometimes tight. I have explained to my kids that I plan my meals to not have leftovers so if they are having someone over, I need to know before I have shopped for that meal so I can plan accordingly.

Now to the fiance. I dont know if I would get him something for himself unless you know him well enough to know of something specific he could use or that he wants. I would however, get something for the two of them together and mark it as such. That way he is included.

birthmothertalks said...

Thanks for answering my questions. I see your guys point about not mentioning the money issue to my friend. So, I will just keep that little issue to myself.
With the food and feeding his gf we will have to keep thinking about it and come to something we all can agree too. I shop weekely so it wouldn't too to easy to just spring it on me the day of. For me it's not all about the cost of groceries but the not asking from my son.
Thanks for the idea of a joint gift for Izzy and her fiannce. I have to keep it small so I am thinking of an ornament for Christmas in addition to what I had already had planned for her.