Dear Izzy

It's been a while since I wrote you a letter. I can't believe that you are 18 years old now. The time really goes by fast. Sometimes, I wish I could shut off the hurt. I miss the life that we should have lived. I would be a different person today if I was your Mother. I believe I would be a better person, because I wouldn't carry so much grief and sorrow inside of me.
How can I ever get over the fact that I am not your Mom. Your Mom is a stranger to me. How can I ever get over the betrayal my family showed me. How can I ever get over all the lies. My heart aches for what should have been. My sweet girl, I love you more than you will ever know. How do I keep going on when I feel so lost inside? I have two great sons.Why I can't be happy like everyone says. You have two sons be happy. Bull shit. It don't work that way. Sweet girl, you will never fully know the pain that I feel, because it's not yours to carry. Love you.