Sunday, May 19, 2013

family stuff

Both of my parents attended my sister's graduation along with my brother and my sister's boyfriend. We all couldn't sit together due to my brother and Dad not being able to climb the stairs due to their health conditions.

That left my Mom and my sister's boyfriend and me sitting in one row to watch my sister graduate.

For the record.. I have seen my Mom more this month than I have probably in a full year.

Remember.. I mentioned my little sister is moving away for college and wondering how that will change family dynamics. My little sister tends to be the one that does a lot for our dad, my brother and see's my Mom more than me. Not a whole lot more but I believe they are/were in communication more than me.

I helped my stepmother get a job cause I can't take her place and give my Dad money so hoping the need won't be there.

Well, anyways, my Mom surprised me by asking did I want to go to six Flags with my sister and her before my sister moves away and that she would pay for it. I was shocked to say the least. My Mom never includes me in the things she does and if I am included it's cause someone else invited me.

I said that I would go but I don't really do the scary rides. I said, " I know Stephen will love the rides" I hope she knows an offer to Six Flags to me is an offer to my son too. I could never go without him. I never knew how much Six Flags costed and now I know about sixty bucks so hope she doesn't mind paying for him too.

I don't know what all this means.. maybe we will get some sort of a relationship back or after my sister is gone.. it will fizzle back down to holidays only. I think I can live with it going either way and while it would be nice to have a relationship and feel wanted by my Mom.

I know I am loved by many and I know I will be okay without the relationship. I know it's not all me. I won't say not me. I know that I carry my own baggage to the relationship. No matter what I will be okay.

On the reunion front of things with Izzy. She will be in town soon. I hope to see her if it's only once while she is here. Her brother is graduating from high school and she is going to be shopping for a place for her wedding.

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