Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Family dynamics

My parents have four children. I am the second born but in the middle because there are two kids under me. I have a pretty good relationship with both of my sisters but one lives far away and after this summer the younger one is moving away. My big sister is here visiting so we all got together and seen her yesterday.

I picked my brother up and we drove to my Dad's place and then after a couple hours all of us four kids drove to my Mom's house and I got to see my Mom's place for the first time since she moved. It's a pretty nice place. I even joked that I was moving in cause the bathroom had a tub with jets in it.

I wonder when my little sister moves how the family dynamics will change for me.

My little sister does quite a bit. She tends to be my Dad's money go to person when he is broke. I don't know she has the money always or the time to deal with it. I helped my stepmother get a job so I am hoping things will be better for them.

My brother and I don't have the best relationship. I love him. I just don't connect with him. We don't have much that holds us together. I might ask him to babysit once in a great while but when it comes to hanging out with each other it's just something we do. My brother has MS and my little sister gives him his shot weekly to slow his progression. I just don't want to do it.

My relationship with my Mom is so strained that I wouldn't ever want to be with her alone. I seen her at Christmas with my whole family and about a month before Christmas I had lunch with my Mom and my sister. There is a part of me that doesn't really want to cut ties with my Mom due to us having family gatherings that she or I would miss out on if I cut my Mom out of my life but then our relationship is mainly superficial. I talk to her, when I see her, cause she is my mom. Just no glue is holding us together.

I don't know what to expect with my little sister moving away. She is the one who has kept the family tradition of some of our holiday dinners. The last couple years it's been at my house. We have done the grocery shopping together and we spend time together cooking. I am not sure what will happen if it's all left on my shoulders to keep the family together.

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