Saturday, July 16, 2011

Are there any other divorced Mom's like me that has one or more children living with the other parent? I have blogged about how one son lives with his Dad and the other one with me. It's a situation that I would never suggest anyone do. Never raise two or more kids in different homes because of divorce. I am not talking about adoption just divorce and assuming they have the same Mom and Dad.

It just causes a lot of conflict and I think jealousy and sadness for me. It's almost like I can't just totally enjoy a moment in time because I think how come Alex isn't with me and when I hear that Alex and his Dad did something fun we kind of think how come they didn't invite Stephen.

But that's not quite the point of my post here.

My oldest son Alex has been always having excuses on why he doesn't want to come over on his weekend to be with us. It usually has something to do with his friends are doing this or he has been invited to this and he doesn't want to miss it. I have told my son to feel free to ask if he wants to do something but he has taken it to the next level with almost always asking or telling me he wants to do this instead of coming over.

I am trying not to take it personal but it's hard. I know our house isn't the coolest place to be. We don't have cable tv. We don't let kids spend hours on the computer. We don't let them spend hours in the living room choose the tv station or movie. We do have netflix. It doesn't mean that we don't do things just not as a constant entertainment for them.

We kind of expect the kids to read books, go outside and they even can hang out in their room at times. We hope they have friends to play with. Alex hasn't quite figured out what to do here even though we have lived her for 4 years now.

I really miss my son. He isn't in the same city. It's not far but about a 20 to 25 minute drive and it's not like I can spend a few minutes in the car and go get him for a few hours. With gas being at almost 4 dollars a gallon I have a hard time justifying that.

Anyone out there with children that come over on weekends? Is there a magic age where the child stops coming over to sleep? I think I was about 17 years of age when I quit going to my Dad's. Is it time to say goodbye to the every other weekend? I can live with that if I know he will still make the effort to come over at other times. Also, basically keep in touch. I told my ex that I wanted Alex to get dropped off on Sunday night when he drops off our other son. I can try to be flexible but I kind of feel like am I suppose to put my life on hold wondering if he is coming or not? I don't want to beg just to get my own kid to come over.

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