Saturday, February 16, 2013

Yesterday, we made Alex get up and get out of the house when my husband drove me to court. I used to fight the issue making him leave but at this point it's not so much an trust issue is that we spend a lot of time doing things for our family and he needs to get off his ass. He has the choice to come with us downtown and could have went a couple places like the unemployment office or hit up a couple places for jobs but he choose to tag along with us and fight with us.

It's a weekend without kids and I have time off from work and he was told in advanced that he isn't to stay home and needs to find somewhere to go. We suggested Dad's, Granda's or his buddies. He insisted he had no where to go and wasn't going to leave. I have to wonder if he does this shit just to get under our skin. The last time I took off and was looking forward to being without kids he came up and took away the weekend that we wanted.

He actually told us this. "you are going to pawn me off on someone else" We were shocked! He is 18 and an legal adult! He is pawning himself off on others. He goes places as he pleases and we have no say.. then we can't be pawning him off. If we dumped my 12 year old on someone else then that would be pawning him off. He went with his Dad who is also his parent so not pawning him off either.

My child's father was friendly as we went into court and looked like he had check stubs. However, he just had a paper showing random dollar amounts and the judge couldn't really figure it out. He asked him what he made and he seemed to skirt around the issue by talking about milage driven and talking about the 11 cents ect. Finally their Dad said he makes 200 to 300 a week and the judge asked what I thought about it. I said I really think that is such a low number for his profession. We have another court date at the end of the next month and he is ordered to bring in actual print out of his earnings.

He did show the paper he showed the judge and I believe he is only showing the amount he got paid on to his bank card that they issue the drivers. So any fee's deducted, taxes or cash advances wouldn't show.

We left court and no one seemed mad. We talked to their Dad about the issue with the weekend and Alex and to his credit he told Alex that even as an adult who isn't paying rent that he doesn't have any say and must stay away. He did offer him up his place for the weekend and Alex kept trying to say how he wants to see his gf on Saturday and also on Friday and Dad seemed willing to work with him on that.

Before we got to court, Alex told us that we never want him around. We bitch when he is home to eat and we bitch when he isn't home to eat. We bitch we want him to get out of the house and we bitch when he leaves. We try to get him out during the day and then he will leave as dinner is being prepared and that's where we get frustrated.

We do get on him sometimes about using too much on one food. I know it may sound petty but when I buy shredded cheese I like it to last for more than one meal and he will put tons on or tons of ketchup. I know it may sound petty but there is only so much of a budget to get food and once it's gone it's gone.


Family Bits said...

I dont get it. Doesnt the DA attach his wages? That would be the easiest way to get child support, and I thought the courts did that in all states automatically.

birthmothertalks said...

We don't really have a DA working on our case. I don't have a lawyer. We are getting support based on 28% of his income but I have good reason to believe that he is making more and can afford to pay for support for our youngest chi.d. I believe he is skirting around what he makes because I just can't believe he would stay out 6 to 8 weeks at a time for 200 to 300 a week. The amount we are getting is coming out of his paycheck and sent weekly.