Christmas party

MELD had it's annaul Christmas party. It was their 30th year up and running. We had a pretty nice time. They had dinner and desert. Also, Santa was there with gifts for the MELD children. The guy that handles the volunteers for the babysitting talked to me about me going only every other week. It went pretty well.

Another great thing about reunion is that it's been easy with my clients to move onto the next stage of openly talking about my daughter. I used to just mention that I have boys. Then, I started saying I have five children between my husband and I. Now, I openly talk about how I have had three children and my oldest is my daughter. I have had the same client for about a year and half and the other one for about four or five months now. Both have some form of dementia so they don't question how I have changed things up when I talk about my children. It's cool that I got to skip the awkward conversation about adoption that I just now have a daughter that I talk about. I don't get into the adoption stuff with them basically it's not going to help me to tell the story 20 times a day. lol. Also, my newest client has adopted children and I just don't want to go there.

A very sweet part of reunion with my lost daughter to adoption is my pleasure to give her gifts for birthdays, Christmas or just because I feel like it. Which I only did that once but it came at time where she said she really needed it. I just love how easy it seems to buy things for her cause she is a girl. I love that her pictures are on my wall for all to see. If it makes anyone in my family uncomfortable then they have the problem. I honestly believe that I enjoy giving her the gifts more than she enjoys them. When one is deprived of something for so long it just changes the whole dynamic of it all.

I remember a time when reading about reunion stories gave me hope but also made me sad cause I felt like I was the only one still missing out on reunion. If your waiting don't lose hope. Some days, you might feel like wishing you could stop loving that person you long for but in your heart you know it just doesn't work that way.

It's beginning to look like my oldest son will be living with me. His Dad isn't happy and said the heats been fixed and the water heater will be fixed this weekend and my son still says not going back there. I don't quite get what's going on over there besides the problems with the mobile home. I knew it was getting serious when my son asks me if he runs away would they look at my place.
Our minor issue is that my ex husband wants my son to give the tv back and then my son won't have one. He has been brought up on video games and movies and this won't be fun for any of us if he doesn't have a tv. I mentioned to my current husband maybe I would buy him one for Christmas and he got mad cause he doesn;t think kids should have better than us. Not as in for Christmas but overall have a better tv or phone in general.
The major issue is that I been debating going and filing for custody and support. Tonight, my ex tried to strike up a deal to have him pay me directly and not change anything. I said, we would have to talk more about it.

I did tell my ex that I really want to see both of the boys living together for this last year or two that Alex is living with parents. It hasn't been easy for them to be apart for five days and then together on the weekend. It's stressful on Stephen and I think Alex too.

I hope this all works out with the least amount of stress as possible and the least amount of fighting.

question

Go visit my private blog. I have a question that I asked and want lots of peoples thoughts on it.

venting

My oldest son has been talking to me about wanting to move back in with us. He has his reasons and some are pretty good ones. I think there maybe more to it like I don't like this new stepmom who just married his Dad. I have been thinking about it a lot. Do we keep talking about it or just go file in court for custody? This could turn into another nasty battle which I really think is bad timing with the holidays but one reason my son wants to move in is that they're furnace don't work and they are using space heaters in a mobile home. They don't have a working hot water heater so they take showers at Grandma's. I have offered my son a place back here for quite sometime but it's just recently that he seems to want to be here with us.
He has been staying about half the week here and then the other half at home. If we are going to go forward then I need child support for our two children. Right now, because we each have one child no one pays.
My son's grandma I guess overheard him talking to someone and he just told me that his Grandma told him privately if he comes to stay with me she isn't buying him a laptop. Now, that is cruel. Also, she shouldn't be buying him one anyways. If his parents who work can't justify buying him a laptop then how does someone living off ssi do it? Also, will be second son get one too? I don't believe playing favorites between kids. Especially if they are brothers/sisters and know what's going on.

I just wanted to vent. This whole laptop thing could influence my son cause he does want one. It's a shame she would even say something like that.

A big part of me just really wants both my sons living together for this last year or two that my oldest is still with a parent. When I am overly nervous wondering if Stephen is okay at the bus stop his brother should be doing the big brother act and watching out for him.

New followers

I have noticed in the last week, I have gained a few new followers. Thanks for your interest in my blog. It's always nice to see people still find what I write interesting enough to follow.